Today is the new year, tomorrow is another day

 

photo-175What a strange way to begin this New Year. My body is to be rendered anew. My mind is attempting the same.  I have found myself second guessing the reality of this serenity I feel, or  I am second guessing the lack of anxiety?  It doesn’t feel right to second guess, but then it is perplexing: this general sense of peace I have felt. Certainly, the love and attentiveness from all reaches has undoubtably added to my mental well being. 

My entourage and I  arrived this evening at the Liberty Hotel, which is both next to and offers an infirmary deal to those also utilizing Mass General Hospital. I am accompanied by my first line: my soul love, Adrian, my mom and dad, Annie and Arthur, hospital caretakers extraordinaire, Georgia, mybeautiful baby number 1, my other dad, Bill, bestower of magical teas and medicine bags that hospitals don’t provide, My sweet smiley unbelievebly hard working little sister, Lorna, and dear deer friend Sara, who provided light just radiating positive.  They are all so necessary for me right now. And though all of them offer so much I have discovered that each of them gives me something more from their presence…presents of strength, calmness, fight, spirituality, confidence, support and positivity. This is a hard road not just for me, but it is scary and exhausting for everyone. I am so lucky, so blessed.

They all have descended to the restaurant and I sit quietly in robe, post bath, waiting for the golightly to go swiftly though my body in preparation for tomorrows surgery. One O’clock eastern time, January 2nd  is when it is to begin. The are removing most if not all of my sigmoid colon. Then they will have a look and perhaps a biopsy of my liver tumors.  I ask you to put me in your thoughts, your prayers, your giggles and white light me through the 3+ hour event.

peace be with you.

 

 

 

9 Responses to “Today is the new year, tomorrow is another day”

  1. Jenn Sargent Says:

    dear sweet, strong, and beautiful lina….
    you are a force to be reckoned with. we are sending you all of our good thoughts and will be with you in spirit tomorrow as you journey through this life of yours. thank you for sharing your words and feelings about your upcoming year. it is truly an honor to your blog. we love you and look forward to spending time with you in 09′.
    love love love
    jenn & billy

  2. Sharon Fantl Says:

    Sweet friend… thank you for inspiring us this morning. We are with you, sending you love and light, hope and happiness. SO glad you are with your force, your family. Makes us smile to know- only wish we could join the clan today. But here we are, thinking of you full strength. Can’t wait to see you and hug you. You are beautiful, brave and fierce. Today is another day and will be okay. We’re loving you and your people.

    xxooxxoo,
    Sharon & Ron

  3. Leigh Says:

    Dear lina
    I can not even begin to say who much i have been thinking about you and yours. You transend the present and become enlightened . You are so much more than physical. You are white light in a dark place and have never been more beautiful… love love love.

  4. Ann in Woodstock Says:

    Dear Lina,
    My thoughts are with you and all of your loved ones. I am taking this crisp air here and turning it into warm light to wrap around you. Please know that I will be Poppy and Henry’s watchdog this week. I will give Poppy hugs and playtime and art class runs and whatever is needed. Vassie and I have connected and things are good.
    Be strong, Be you,
    Ann

  5. Levi Says:

    Looks like it’s almost starting. I can’t believe how fast this is all happening!

    I will be thinking of you over the next few hours, days, weeks, months. Be well, my friend. Thanks for letting us know what’s in your heart and mind.

  6. Ellen Says:

    Olen, the kids and I are driving to White River Junction-of all places! I am taking every second of this trip thinking of you and sending you love! Thanks for blogging. Eskimo kisses to you.

  7. Sarah Says:

    Hello Luv,
    I am hoping you are resting peacefully after your surgery (it is now 5:08pm). I have spent the day thinking of you laughing, running, playing with your beautiful kids, this grey chapter in your life having closed, and a new golden one beginning. I love you so much, Lina.
    Sarah

  8. Alexandra Says:

    Dearest Lina
    You have been so much in my thoughts.
    I am sending you big hugs.
    Those chubby thighs have been squeezed and he sends big giggles and love to you. As do I.
    Your heart shines on all those who know you.
    Love,
    Alex

  9. Billy-Bob Daddy-o Says:

    So, Lina Bean, 34 (yes),34 years ago you helped me build a cabin for Annie, Lorna, and you. You held up the walls(literally) of our future. Since then, my sweet child, you have held up my walls with a strength that I have so, so appreciated. I have my moments, as many know, of delusion and confusion (too many smacks on the head, sometimes by myself). Going off on tangents, too. Well, my sweet, I’m here to help you hold up the walls of your life. To help you with the house that you and Adrian and my grand babies will live in. I am so looking forward to being with you and all. And helping you rebuild your body(bawdy) house, You can be such a gutter snipe sometimes, as your friends all know. I’ll be there in a week and we’ll get started on the reconstruction. I love you so very much. Daddy-o

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